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What Do You STRIVE For, And Why?

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Although, perhaps, it is the most important thing, any of us, might possibly do, few individuals, consistently, proceed forward, in an introspective way, and give ourselves, a realistic, check – up, from the neck – up! If, we hope to become, the best we can be, it is essential to perceive and conceive of, create, and emphasize, having meaningful goals, pursuing them, proactively, and considering which options, and alternatives, might, be best, for you, and proceeding to, STRIVE for them! How, and what one seeks, and is ready, willing, and able, to put forth an elevated degree of effort, and emphasis, on, and towards, and knowing/ understanding, why this matters (to you, personally), is an essential, first step! With that in mind, this article will attempt to, briefly, consider, examine, review, and discuss, using the mnemonic approach, what this means and represents, and why it matters.

1. Solutions; system; strengths/ stronger; service: It’s important to identify, both, your personal strengths, as well as weaknesses, and use every area of strength, to become stronger, and better, while addressing areas of weakness! One must seek solutions, and develop, a personal system, which makes sense to you, and serves your best interests, in both the shorter, and longer – term!

2. Tastes; tendencies; tenacious; try: Are you willing to try, with maximum efforts, to become better, and stronger? It takes a tenacious attitude, which addresses, your personal tendencies, and understands your tastes, and reasoning!

3. Relevant; realistic; rationale; relationships: Avoid the tendency to, either, lie to yourself, or minimize potential ramifications! It serves your best interests, to proceed, in a realistic, and relevant way, examine your rationale, and determine if your existing relationships, are positive, and/ or, productive!

4. Integrity; ideas; ideals/ ideology; imagination; innovate: Only, when one proceeds, consistently, with absolute integrity, and avoids short – cuts, even, when a path – of – least – resistance, may be simpler (in the short – term), will he proceed, with a well – developed, imagination, and a willingness to innovate, rather than settling for the same – old, same – old, approaches, etc! Strive to align your ideas, with genuine ideals, and learn to understand, your personal reasoning, reasons, and ideology!

5. Vision; views; values; valuable: Is your vision, truly, valuable, to you, and what you want, out – of – life? Examine, and consider, how you determine, your views, and whether, you fully understand, your personal values!

6. Excellence; efforts; enrich; expertise; expectations: Will you demand your utmost degree of personal excellence, and align, your efforts, towards enriching, as many aspects, of your life, as possible? Will you learn from everything you hear, and experience, in order to gain the expertise, to proceed, with more judgment, and, hopefully, greater wisdom? Examine your expectations, and, know, what you, really, want, out, of life!

What do you STRIVE for, and why? Will your attitude, aptitude, efforts, and actions, serve your best interests?

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Dealing With Toxic People When Mourning

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It is not uncommon, when coping with great losses, to have a well-meaning friend, acquaintance, or family member say the wrong thing at the wrong time. They may tell you that you need to take a specific action or that it is time to make a particular change and start getting back to being your old self. You know and I know that getting back to being as we were before the loss occurred just isn’t going to happen. Big losses change us.

Again, I emphasize that toxic people think they are doing the right thing and want to help you out. However, we are all products of a culture that distorts the grief process and continues to pass on the myths learned early in life. Sometimes toxic people have an accurate piece of information to convey but the timing is horribly wrong. Or as one actively grieving widow once said to me, “How does she know what my needs are?” Good caregivers are essentially good listeners not tellers of what one needs.

What can we do to cope with the additional stress these unwanted remarks generate? Here are five approaches to consider.

1. As hard as it might be, try to maintain your composure as you respond to the person. To quickly snap back with a stinging remark only heightens your justifiable anger (as well as the physical changes that go with it) and may very well cause a temporary break in your relationship with the person. Of course, much depends on the nature of the remark and the tone of voice in which it was delivered.

2. Try a simple reply such as, “I’m not ready to do that” or “I know you mean well, but I have to make the changes I need according to my timetable.” That may be all that is required. Also, there is nothing wrong if you decide not to respond in any way. Read the situation, and then take the appropriate action.

3. Reduce contact with people who don’t get the message or expect you to follow their agenda for your grief. Their nonverbal communication will give them away every time. When you have to be in their presence, be polite (it will save you much energy) but part company as soon as possible. There is nothing wrong with absenting yourself from a situation where you know you would have to talk to the person for an extended period of time. You are simply caring for yourself.

4. Everyone grieves differently but not everyone knows this important concept. Thus, you may be able to prevent unwanted remarks by telling your caregivers we are all different in the way we adapt. Normalize your grief for them. In short, teach them what your grief is like. Yet, emphasize how much you appreciate all they have done and how grateful you are for their being around your pain and listening to your thoughts. In short, you are educating your support system, even though it is a difficult time for you to be the teacher.

5. Finally, carefully consider the following. Has a person who said something to you that was upsetting experienced a loss very similar to your great loss? For example, was it one widow speaking to another or was it someone who has little or no insight into what you are experiencing? I do not mean to imply that a person who has experienced a similar loss knows your grief.

No one can know another’s grief experience because every relationship is one of a kind. However, is it possible that what the person said to you was something that could be helpful as you proceed in your grief journey? I once heard a widow say, “It takes one to know one” implying there is often compatibility and awareness among those who have suffered similar losses. That person may (and may not) in the long run be helpful to you. You just were not ready to hear whatever was said.

In summary, it is important to be kind in your response to the toxic person. Keep in mind that many potential caregivers are at a loss as to what to say to one who is mourning. They need direction. Often, their sadness in seeing you in so much pain causes them to try to do anything they think is helpful. In the final analysis, only you can decide how much additional pain the person continues to cause by being around you. Because of the stress of grief you may have to limit your conversations or else choose to add to your existing burden.

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Feeding the Elderly When They Can’t Feed Themselves

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Sometimes the elderly encounter problems when eating. They may be unable to physically manipulate utensils. They may be unable to understand how to get started eating. They may be unable to continue feeding themselves after starting because of fatigue. When you are helping someone by feeding them or helping them to feed themselves, there are several things to think about.

Always sit to the side of the person you are feeding. If you are right-handed, sit on their right side. If you are left-handed, sit on their left side. However, if you are working with them to provide assistance (i.e. having them hold the utensil and guiding their actions) sit on the side that they are using. Try to sit next to the person in such a way that they are still able to see you. Never sit in front of the person and feed them as if they were an infant – this is demeaning. Never feed a person while standing up. This makes the person feel rushed and contributes to a head tilt backwards that can cause choking. This is also true when giving a drink or pills to someone. You should always be on the same level.

Encourage the person to feed themselves when possible. They may be able to pick up finger foods such as french fries, bread, fruit slices, etc. Sandwiches are an excellent way to encourage self-feeding. Cream soups placed in coffee cups are also easy to handle. Some people may continue to feed themselves if you help them get started by putting your hand over the top of their hand, scooping the food, and helping them to get it to their mouth. This is particularly true of people who have dementia.

Whenever possible, try to serve foods that can either be picked up with the fingers or eaten with a spoon. Trying to switch back and forth between utensils can be confusing and physically challenging. Look at the size of the utensils that are being used and be sure that they are the right size. If the person has a tendency to take very large bites, try using a smaller spoon. If you are feeding someone, the spoon should only be half full.

Encourage the person to tell you what they would like. If they are unable to tell you what they want, try to present the more nutritious items first. Be careful about presenting a lot of liquids early in the meal or putting a dessert out before the main course has been eaten. The elderly often fill up on liquids or sweets before they have had a chance to eat healthier items. If there is something that the person really does not seem to like, try to provide another item.

Pay close attention to the temperature of the food. When in doubt, use a food thermometer to check. Keep in mind that the person you are feeding may not be able to tell you if something is wrong with the food. They may also have reduced sensation due to medical conditions. A good rule of thumb is to take no more than 45 minutes for a meal. After that much time has gone by, the food is no longer tasty and the person that you are feeding is probably getting very worn out. It is better to give smaller meals more frequently or provide snacks between meals. Eating should always be a pleasurable experience.

Be sure to note any problems with chewing or swallowing. These may be related to ill-fitting dentures, declining mental status, or physical problems. These should be reported to a physician quickly so that appropriate steps can be taken to insure that the person can eat safely.

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How Can I Invest in a Movie and Make Money With a Movie?

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You may have heard that movie investments, especially low budget movie investments, can be very lucrative. This can be true, and you may be excited about investing in a movie, but not know how to find a movie project to invest in. You may also be wondering about what to look for in a low budget movie project, and what to watch out for. This article will explain how to find a movie project to invest in, and how to determine if it has a good chance of being a successful movie that will produce a good profit.

In your search for a movie project to invest in, you can simply search the internet using the key words “how to invest in a movie” and you will get a good start in your search. You will find a myriad of different articles, relating to this topic and associated topics. If you keep searching, you will find some movie projects with budgets that are within the realm of what you want to invest, and which have a story line that appeals to you. The term small budget in this article means movies costing under $300,000.

You will also find investment opportunities for bigger budget movies, where someone sets up a company which is funded by a pool of small investors. The budget for the movie may be 10 to 50 million dollars, and you can invest only $50,000 to $100,000 if you wish.

It is most important to know that movies with budgets under $300,000 actually have a chance of earning a much higher return than budgets costing in the multi millions. For instance, with a budget of 30 million dollars, the movie will most likely have to get a theatrical release to make a profit. Because of the limited number of movie screens available, getting a theatrical release is difficult, with strong competition from large Hollywood studios for those limited screens. On the other hand, a movie that costs $300,000, can break even if it is shown on TV only once. With TV networks worldwide on the constant lookout for new movies to broadcast, it can be relatively easy to double or triple your investment with relative ease. Some movies costing under $300,000 have made over a hundred million dollars. This type of return is rare of course, but it is possible.

For any movie to make money, the story must be interesting and captivating, and have something unique and special about it. Movies that are based on a true story have a higher chance of success. And here is smoothing very important to know. A good story is more important than big name stars, or special effects. You can verify this by checking the movie listings on TV. You will see movies you never heard of, yet they have big name stars. It is because they were actually box office flops. Yes, they are good enough to get on TV, but they may never break even.

A low budget movie on the other hand, can make good money if it is only shown on TV. If it turns out to be exceptional, it can get a theatrical release, and make really big money.

One thing to look for in a low budget movie investment, is to see if the writer/director is putting their own money into it. The writer/director should have some past successes, such as some awards, and TV sales, even if they are just with short films. Most low budget movies are made by writer/directors who are moving up from short films to feature films. If they have already made some feature films, they are also likely to now be working on bigger budget films. The key is to find someone who looks to be a rising star, and to capitalize on their strong commitment to their movie.

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