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What Do Theories of Loss Tell Us?

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Ever since bereavement and loss entered the field of science, there has been a lot discussion about how it affects us. Although the research here is specifically related to bereavement, it’s interesting to consider it in terms of others losses too. I don’t know how scientifically sound it is but I truly believe the best way to learn is to look to others things and draw comparisons:)

Sigmund Freud

It might or might not surprise you to know that it was Sigmund Freud in his 1917 work “Mourning and Melancholia” that first brought the issue of loss to the scientific field. He theorised that in order to successfully resolve grief you needed to sever all ties with the deceased. This was a painful process that required work. This idea influenced how we perceived loss for decades despite not being scientifically tested and Freud admitting himself that there were some paradoxes that he couldn’t explain in relation to his own experiences of loss.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

The next influential theories developed in the 1950’s through the work of John Bolwby and Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. Kubler-Ross from her work with dying patients identified 5 stages of loss, namely denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Once again there was no scientific evaluation of this and when the stages were applied to bereaved people it was found that it didn’t really work like this. People don’t go through all the stages in the same way, can return and experience them again and again or miss stages completely. It’s now accepted that this is more like a vague guide. Yet despite this, her theory may well be the most well known and out of all the theories I’m talking about here, probably the one that you are most likely to be aware of.

John Bowlby

His work on loss centred on the attachment to the person you had lost. Developed from work with Children and their separation from their mothers, he proposed that when our attachment to an individual was broken we could suffer serious effects. In order to successfully resolve our grief we had to undertake “work” which could be hard and painful.

The Dual Process Coping Model

A more recent theory on how we cope with bereavement was developed by Margaret Stroebe and Hank Schut in 1999. They proposed that within everyday life there were two mechanisms that help us adapt to loss. One mechanism allows us to experience our reaction, think of the deceased, etc whilst the other helps us understand how we are going to adjust to the world following our loss. We move back and forward from one to the other as we move through our loss. Although a theory, it’s been scientifically tested with success.

The Other Side of Sadness

Even more recently, as in last year, George Bonanno published his book with the same title as above in which he states that 85% of us have an innate resilience to coping with loss. During his more than 20 years studying the field of loss he has found even though loss does affect us deeply, there are still moments of joy and laughter and we can continue on with our lives without much disruption. His research finds that there is no support for stages of grief like we thought. Our journey is unique for all of us; some of us need to talk about it others don’t.

This is only a short summary of the theories. If you want to explore them further, I’ve added a list of further reading. I do have one suggestion though, if you have experienced a loss recently and are still exploring it, go directly to George Bonanno’s book. For me, this is the only book you need to read and one which I wish had been around when I lost my brother. It’s also useful to apply to other losses too.

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How Do Teachers Assess Online Learners’ Output?

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Online teaching can be both fun and challenging to teachers who are facilitating. Yes, not only does he/she have the technical expertise but also the ability to assess the following materials submitted by their learners, virtually or on ground, for some special cases like using digital camera to document a play, procedural tasks, among others:

1. Print – compilation of drawings, photographs, magazine clippings and so on organized according to its importance or what, could be great evidences of learning. Yes, sort of mov’s or mode of verifications (student’s version) where their mastered skills could be assessed against rubrics.

2. Non-print – voice clips, recorded audio or video of assigned or chosen task/s could be great way to gauge learner’s learning mastery level. Not only do they have a chance to showcase their skills in making and recording voice/video, but also they can flaunt their skills in speaking, acting, writing (script) skills, among others.

3. Digital – output like video of a skit made, procedures of creating something, and the like could be uploaded to YouTube and other web servers, can be appraised anytime as well, by a teacher or someone tasked to do so.

Yes, there you have materials which could be uploaded as audio or video files or could be stored in memory disk or stick for easy assessment purposes. While the making of those could be both fun and challenging to learners, teachers, as well, have same experience ensuring that everybody has submitted and could get the right assessment based on the established rubric right before the term or quarter.

Telling them the criteria and the expectations beforehand could be springboard for learners to produce outstanding outputs which could give them favorable feedback or encouragement later developing their skills so as to have mastery and all.

A conscientious teacher knows how to give the needed support, even to the point of challenging learners discover more their talents with regards to the skill/s being developed, and could go beyond classroom, either virtually or on ground.

Few and far between are people who understand the essence of right mentoring, both for teacher and learners improved performance: the former for providing the right resources, and for the latter, the needed boost to go on discovering their strength so as to become active learners, and gradually users of right information.

This kind of endeavor for both of them could be the beginning of more fun and meaningful exchange of resources so as to get the wisdom from lessons taught and absorbed by both parties. Teachers and learners via virtual or online class can have engagement, effective and efficient, as long as they are willing and able to give their best toward realization of their goal/s.

Yes, there is always a need for authentic learning gauged by competent teachers who know the impact of feedback-giving to their eager learners developing skills toward self-actualization journey.

So there you go. More wisdom coming your way as we go together toward getting ourselves competent enough to provide the needed skills for our learners to becoming free and skillful users of information for their own magnificent growth and development. Cheers!

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When Will I Ovulate?

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Any woman who’s looking to get pregnant (plus some that are not) could be helped by knowing the solution to that question. It’s all associated with the menstrual period, which doesn’t often stick to the regular 28 day pattern that’s discussed in magazines.

Ovulation may be the moment around the center of the menstrual period when an egg is released in the ovaries, ready to become fertilized within the womb. For those who have a regular-as-clockwork 28 day cycle, this can probably happen on day 14, fourteen days after your last period started.

However, ovulation is timed with regards to the beginning of the following cycle, not the final one. It generally happens around fourteen days before the beginning of the next period. Therefore if your cycle is under 28 days, you’ll ovulate before day 14. If it’s a lot more than 28 days, you’ll ovulate later. And when your cycle isn’t completely predictable, that is true for many women, it’s very hard to know precisely whenever you will ovulate because you don’t know when the next period will begin.

Furthermore, ovulation doesn’t necessarily happen at a similar reason for your cycle each time. Which means that to reach at a precise response to the question, “When will I ovulate?”, we will have to find other ways of determining when ovulation is happening.

Physical Signs Of Ovulation

Physical signs of ovulation include tender or swollen breasts plus some discomfort or pain within the abdomen, just like a little hint of period pains. These aren’t very reliable indications of ovulation, however, simply because they might have many causes.

Another physical sign that’s more useful may be the alternation in texture from the cervical mucus. Before and round the time of ovulation you will see more mucus discharged in the vagina, also it becomes sticky, thick and stretchy, and you can stretch it a few inches with the fingers. This kind of mucus helps the sperm to live while they’re awaiting an egg to become released in the ovaries.

In case your mucus doesn’t alter in texture, you need to visit a fertility doctor. It might mean that you may have trouble conceiving a child without assistance.

Temperature

Taking your temperature every morning can provide you with a sign of when you’re ovulating. You will have to record it on the chart to be able to begin to see the normal level and also the difference when it changes. Temperature heightens by around 1 degree at ovulation (varying from 1/2 to 1-1/2 degrees).

Obviously, for those who have a fever or certain other conditions, your temperature is going to be affected. However, this process can provide you with information of when you’re ovulating, specifically if you combine it using the mucus method. The only real equipment required is really a thermometer which you’ll purchase from any pharmacy.

Measuring The Hormonal levels

The 3rd and in all likelihood most accurate method to know when you will ovulate is by using an ovulation predictor kit. These measure the amount of luteinizing hormone or LH within the urine. They’re very easy to use, you just need to pee on a stick every day. The LH level rises as ovulation approaches.

Ovulation predictors are wonderful except you need to keep purchasing the kits. They aren’t too costly but don’t forget you may need them for many cycles. Still, this might be the most accurate method to know the solution to the question, “When will I ovulate?”

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Live Charity Auctions – What to Sell?

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The best items to sell at your charity auction are one-of-a-kind opportunities that have no limit to their value. Things that are not easily obtained elsewhere will create the most profitable bidding wars and intense excitement in the audience. 

When there is a stated retail value, bidders tend to stop at that amount. They will feel that there is a pre-set spending limit and may not want others to see them spending more for the item than what it is worth.

Avoid donated items that tend to sell below their actual value.  These are usually artwork, professional services and jewelry.  They are considered individual choices and usually do not sell well at auctions. The value of common artwork is dependent upon the buyers’ tastes in the room. You are unlikely to have enough bidders with similar preferences for art in the audience to create a bidding competition. Selling professional services is also difficult. Most women guests have a hair salon that they already frequent. Lawyers, accountants, and other professionals are usually chosen by referral or reputation and buyers at an auction would be unlikely to purchase services from one they do not know. Jewelry, even if appraised at a high value, is difficult to sell at a charity auction because of personal preference. Unless you know that you have several ready bidders prior to your benefit auction event, avoid these types of items.

Your charity auctioneer may have a list of the highest selling items for the best fundraising auction. Your success is financially important to your organization, and it begins with acquiring the best donated items for selling at the live auction.

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