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Book Summary: "Just Listen" by Mark Goulston

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Goulston, a psychologist, consultant, author and frequent contributor on TV, has written an insightful and example-laden book that explores many facets of not “just” listening, but of effective communication, in general. Subtitled “Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone,” the author lays out nine core rules for getting through to anyone and then provides twelve quick and easy ways to achieve buy-in and get through.

As background, Goulston explains that all persuasion involves moving people through the steps of what he calls the “Persuasion Cycle:”

1. From resisting to listening

2. From listening to considering

3. From considering to willing to do

4. From willing to do to doing

5. From doing to glad they did and continuing to do.

The tenet of the book is that you get through to people by having them “buy in,” which occurs when they move from “resisting” to “listening” to “considering” what you’re saying. And that the key to gaining “buy in” and then moving people through the rest of the cycle is not what you tell them, but what you get them to tell you – and what happens in their minds in the process.

Following, I briefly address each of Goulston’s nine core rules and twelve quick techniques:

Nine Core Rules

  1. Move Yourself from “Oh crap to OK” – Stress interferes with your ability to reach people, so get your emotions under control… quickly. Strive to move from your initial reaction through the release (or realization) phase, through the recenter phase, the refocus phase, and finally to the reengage phase. When you do so, you go from being fixated on the way you are convinced the world should or shouldn’t be, but never will be, to being ready to deal with the world the way it is.
  2. Rewire Yourself to Listen – We tend to size up people instantly based on what we’ve heard about them or experienced first-hand. However, our first impressions and first impressions are a jumbled mix of truth, fiction and prejudice. We end up dealing with a fictitious creation, not the real person. If you want to open the lines of communication, open your own mind first to determine who they really are.
  3. Make the Other Person Feel “Felt” – This simply means putting yourself in the other person’s shoes. When you “get” each other, you can change the dynamics of a strained situation or relationship to cooperation, collaboration, and effective communication.
  4. Be More Interested than Interesting – To master the skill of being interested, and being sincere when you do it, stop thinking about a conversation as a tennis match where the goal is to score more points than your opponent. Instead, think of it as a detective game, in which your goal is to learn as much about the other person as you can. Ask questions that demonstrate that you want to learn more, e.g., that will cause them to say “I feel x, I think y, I did or would do z.”
  5. Make People Feel Valuable – People need to feel valuable; even (or possibly especially) the complainers, whiners, and obstructers. Both the good people in your life and the annoying people need and deserve reassurance that they matter. Do so, and they’ll give you what you need. Everyone competes for time, but no one should need to compete for importance.
  6. Help People to Exhale Emotionally and Mentally – Stress isn’t bad. It causes us to focus, become determined, and test our mettle. It’s when stress crosses over to distress that problems result. Even though it can be very difficult, allow people to vent and get as much off of their chest as they feel is possible, without you interrupting or being judgmental. The saying goes to “Forget the music. If you want to soothe the savage beast, get the beast to exhale.”
  7. Check Your Dissonance at the Door – Dissonance occurs when you think you’re coming across in one way but people see you in a totally different way. For example, you think you’re confident, energetic, and passionate, but others see you as arrogant, hyper, and impulsive. It also occurs when you think you perceive someone else accurately, but the other person doesn’t agree. So how can you know how others perceive you? Ask your friends, relatives and coworkers.
  8. When All Seems Lost, Bare Your Neck – When you’re cornered and feel like baring your teeth, instead reach deeper, feel your fear, face up to your deficiencies and tell others that you’ll do your best to reform. As Keith Ferrazzi says, “Don’t be afraid of sharing your vulnerabilities. Vulnerability doesn’t make you weak, it makes you accessible.”
  9. Steer Clear of Toxic People – Strip people who want to con you, bully you, thwart you, or make you a scapegoat for their mistakes, of the power to hurt you. Goulston writes that “If you’re hesitant to say “No,” you may be neurotic. If you’re truly afraid to say “No,” you’re probably dealing with a toxic person. And if nobody ever say’s “No” to you, that toxic person could be you.”

Twelve Quick and Easy Ways to Achieve Buy-In and Get Through

  1. The Impossibility Question (or “kicking but”): You ask “What’s something that would be impossible to do, but if you could do it, would dramatically increase your success.” Then after they respond, you ask “What would make it possible?”
  2. The Magic Paradox: When you help spell out a person’s reasons for being negative or disagreeing, you shift them into a more positive attitude and agreeing.
  3. The Empathy Jolt: When two people are beating on each other instead of communicating, or a person is more interested in attacking than in listening, insert a jolt of empathy. The author writes that “anger and empathy can’t exist in the same place at the same time,” so be curious and strive to understand what challenges they’re dealing with.
  4. The Reverse Play, Empathy Jolt #2: Use this if you’re dealing with someone who has the skills and ability to do the job, but isn’t giving it 100 percent. But instead of criticizing and laying out where they’re falling short, mention some reasons why you might be disappointing them. By doing the unexpected and apologizing yourself, the other person will shift out of defensive mode and tend to mirror your humility and concern. “An ounce of apology is worth a pound of resentment.”
  5. Ask “Do Your Really Believe That?”: Before you worry about solving someone else’s problem, find out if there really is a problem.
  6. The Power of “Hmmm… “: Respond to someone who is mad and defensive with something neutral like “Hmmm” or “Tell me more” or “Really?” or “Then what happened” or “What else can you tell me?” Don’t get defensive; go deeper.
  7. The Stipulation Gambit: Instead of hiding a weakness or problem, neutralize it. Show poise by openly expressing the misgivings people have about you, and they’ll be more likely to give you their positive and undivided attention.
  8. From Transaction to Transformation: Transactional communications don’t create traction in a relationship because they’re impersonal and shallow. So we need to move beyond transacting to relating by asking questions that let the other person tell you: “This is what I think,” “This is who I am,” “This is what I want to achieve,” or “This is how you can play a part in making my life better.” Endeavor with this “eyes-to-the-sky” technique to get others to look up and reflect.
  9. Side by Side: Ask questions during a shared moment and then deepen the conversation with more questions (forming the core of the Socratic Method). This technique is based on three facts: 1) sitting people down and lecturing them rarely works, because it makes them defensive and to hide things from you; 2) questioning works better than telling; and 3) when you allow one revelation to lead to another without getting in the way, you learn even more.
  10. Fill In the Blanks: Invite people into a conversation with fill-in-the-blanks approach rather than asking questions that put them on the defensive. Direct questions make people think you’re talking at them. Let them fill in the blanks, and they’ll feel you’re talking with them.
  11. Take It All the Way to “No”: Keep pushing for what you want until you receive a “no.” Then get them to move from “no” to “yes” by saying something like “I either pushed too hard or failed to address something that was important to you, didn’t I?” Then use the fill-in-the-blanks or other effective questioning approach to build on the moment.
  12. The Power Thank You and Power Apology: Use a Power Thank You when an ordinary “thanks” won’t do; it has 3 parts: 1) reference something specific the person did for you; 2) acknowledge the effort it took them; and 3) tell them the difference that his or her act personally made to you. Whereas the Power Apology, when warranted, consists of the 4 R’s: Remorse, Restitution, Rehabilitation, and Requesting forgiveness.

One key to reaching people is to be reachable yourself. I’d love to hear from you regarding this book and any feedback you have as you give some of these concepts and techniques a try.

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How to Record Zoom Meeting as a Participant & Without Host Permission

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Zoom meetings are fast-paced and frenetic, which makes it challenging for your team to stay on the same page. This can make it difficult to keep discussions brief and concise. To help keep everyone on the same page, you can use a Zoom meeting recording app. Participants can listen to the meeting and take notes without disrupting the flow of the meeting. The best part? You don’t need to be an IT pro to set up a Zoom meeting recording. Follow these simple steps to start recording your team’s meetings.

What is a Zoom Meeting Recording?

Unlike a normal meeting, which is audio-only, a Zoom meeting allows you to both see and hear everyone in the meeting room. Zoom takes notes during the meeting and sends the audio recording straight to your inbox. Then, you can edit and annotate the recording with your team’s comments. You can also share the recording with others who are on the meeting attendee list. Once you start recording, you can pause and resume the Zoom recording if you need to. And don’t worry, your team won’t be able to see that you’re recording them. Zoom offers several different recording options, so you can find one that works for your team.

Record Your Team’s Meetings with Zoom

If you’re looking to start recording your team’s Zoom meetings, consider setting up a recurring meeting. Every week, you can schedule a Zoom meeting to record the meeting. This makes it easier to stay consistent. You can also use a Zoom meeting recording app like Webex Meetings or Zoom to record your team’s meetings on your smartphones and tablets. Before you can record a meeting, make sure the option is turned on in your Zoom settings. Next, invite everyone to join the meeting via the company-wide Zoom app.  If you have any questions about the recording, click “Ask the host” and send an email to the host.

Set Up a Zoom Meeting Recording

While recording a Zoom meeting is convenient, you’ll want to make sure it’s set up correctly. Begin by inviting everyone who will be invited to the meeting to join via the Zoom app. Then, start the meeting and make sure the “Record” option is turned on. If the meeting is audio-only, then you won’t be able to record it. But, you can use a screen recorder like Camtasia to record the meeting. If the meeting is audio-only, then you won’t be able to record it. But, you can use a screen recorder like Camtasia to record the meeting. Once the meeting is finished recording, you’ll be able to view and edit the recording in your Zoom inbox. When you’re ready to save it, select “Save” from the header. If you have any questions, you can send an email to the host or host leader.

how to record zoom meeting

If you’re looking to start recording your team’s Zoom meetings, consider setting up a recurring meeting. Every week, you can schedule a Zoom meeting to record the meeting. This makes it easier to stay consistent. You can also use a Zoom meeting recording app like Webex Meetings or Zoom to record your team’s meetings on your smartphones and tablets. Before you can record a meeting, make sure the option is turned on in your Zoom settings. Next, invite everyone to join the meeting via the company-wide Zoom app. Once everyone has accepted the invite, they will automatically be added to the meeting. Then, you can start the meeting and begin recording.  When you’re ready to save it, select “Save” from the header. If you have any questions, you can send an email to the host or host leader.

screen recorder

If you want to start recording your team’s Zoom meetings, you can use a screen recorder like Camtasia. This will allow you to record the meeting audio and take screen recordings. If your team uses Zoom, you can also use a screen recorder like Camtasia to record the meeting audio and take screen recordings. This will help you stay on the same page with your team. Once you’ve set up your Zoom meeting recording, host the meeting and start recording. Then, start the screen recorder to record the meeting audio and take screen recordings. You can use these recordings to help your team stay on the same page. Make sure to set the screen recorder’s audio level to “Mic +” or “Mic Only.” This will make sure you don’t accidentally record the meeting audio. Next, share your screen recordings with your team. They can then view and edit their screen recordings to make sure everyone is on the same page.

wrap up the meeting after the recording

 When you’re ready to save it, select “Save” from the header. END the meeting by announcing that it’s time to end the meeting. If you want to add a closing remark, then do so. But, make sure to announce that the meeting is over. If you have any questions, you can send an email to the host or host leader. END the meeting by announcing that it’s time to end the meeting. If you want to add a closing remark, then do so. But, make sure to announce that the meeting is over. If you have any questions, you can send an email to the host or host leader.

screen recorder Windows 10

One benefit of recording your team’s Zoom meetings is that you can use a screen recorder like Camtasia. This will allow you to record the meeting audio and take screen recordings. If your team uses Zoom, you can also use a screen recorder like Camtasia to record the meeting audio and take screen recordings. This will help you stay on the same page with your team. Make sure to set the screen recorder’s audio level to “Mic +” or “Mic Only.” This will make sure you don’t accidentally record the meeting audio. Next, share your screen recordings with your team. They can then view and edit their screen recordings to make sure everyone is on the same page.

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6 Tik Tok Mistakes To Avoid For Building A Good Marketing Strategy

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6 Tik Tok Mistakes To Avoid For Building A Good Marketing Strategy

Sometimes we people can lag having something new in a day, but our technology speed would never. Tech fields have touched spikes from the past to now by seeing the launch of social networking sites every day. If it comes to sharing an example, then nothing can beat the craze of Tik Tok marketing that people are still in the same passion and looking to shift to another platform that helps them gain popularity within a night. Counting the estimate from past years, Tik Tok has reached 800 million+ fans worldwide.

Tik Tok has gained massive success till it has ruled the market singlehandedly. But there are some mistakes if tackled with time then, the future can be different for it. If you want to build a good brand identity, you must avoid some mistakes that help you eliminate the situation that might become a hurdle for you in the future ahead.

  • Not Targeting The Right Audience.

The most common reason for not surviving TikTok in the market so long is that it is mainly coming into force to entertain the public at large. As it has whooping popularity with 8-00+ billion followers, people have started placing their ads on that. So selecting the niche where you need to target your audience is very important for avoiding mistakes for existence.

  • Not Being Fun

Before posting something on any social media or engaging platform, we have to analyze the content that needs to be placed accordingly. Like TikTok is a platform for entertainment and fun, you can’t place serious and wooden content there for gaining views. It’s just like you are ruining the pace of things meant to be there.

  • Not Sharing User-Generated Content

It needs to be deeply researched into what kind of videos can gain a high engagement rate. Not all kinds of videos are supposed to be posted there, as TikTok marketingdemands user-generated content. Try to build or gain the trust of your followers by making them feel comfortable with your linking. 

  • Not Feeling The Urgency Of Influencers

People love to believe those they feel more engaged with regularly or more frequently. So taking support from influencers to boost engagement on your platform would be a great move that can help you increase your brand visibility and increase followers’ reach. 

  • Lagging In Hashtag Challenges

If you have stepped into social media platforms, you must have good knowledge of how beautifully you can use hashtags. So sit and research what could be the best hashtags that can go well with your brand reach and how you can use them to increase your audience range.

  • Not Looking Realistic

Excessive promotional activity can snatch the realness out of your brand. Alternatively, you can go with content that indirectly benefits your product or services. Finally, try to adopt a more natural approach to encourage the brand so that followers love to become a part of your journey.

Takeaway

If you are searching for a reference where you can get all the amazing things done with your social media handles, you can reach out on the page ‘Socialboosting“. If your purpose is to increase the number of followers, boost engagement, Quality followers, and marketing tips, you should not delay reaching out there. Give it a right try in just the right way.

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Secrets to AI PRAPHRASING TOOL

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PRAPHRASING TOOL

If you’re like most people, you probably think that artificial intelligence (AI) is some sort of magic. After all, it can do things like read and understand human language, recognize faces and objects, and even beat humans at complex games like chess.

But the truth is, AI is just a tool. And like any tool, it can be used for good or for bad.

In this article, we’re going to talk about some of the ways that AI can be used for evil purposes. 

We’ll also discuss what you can do to protect yourself from these malicious uses of AI.

1. Creating Fake Videos and Photos

One of the most worrying ways that AI can be used for evil purposes is to create fake videos and photos. This is also known as “deep fakes.”

Deep fakes are created by using a type of AI called a generative adversarial network (GAN). A GAN consists of two neural networks: a generator and a discriminator.

The generator creates fake data, while the discriminator tries to distinguish between the real and fake data. The two networks compete with each other, and as they do, the generator gets better and better at creating realistic fake data. Check RemoteDBA for more details.

Deep fakes have been used to create fake celebrity porn, as well as political propaganda. In 2018, for example, a deep fake video of Barack Obama went viral. The video featured Obama saying things that he never actually said.

2. Stealing Your Personal Data

Another way that AI can be used for evil purposes is to steal your personal data. This is possible because many popular applications and websites use AI to recommend content to you based on your interests.

In order to do this, these applications and websites need to collect data about you. This includes things like your age, gender, location, and what you like to do online.

Once they have this data, they can sell it to advertisers or use it to influence your behavior.

3. Manipulating the Stock Market

AI can also be used to manipulate the stock market. This is possible because there are now algorithms that can automatically trade stocks based on certain conditions.

Some of these algorithms are designed to take advantage of human behavior. For example, they may buy stocks when prices are low and sell them when prices are high. This can result in huge profits for the people who own these algorithms, but it can also crash the stock market.

4. Disrupting Elections

AI can also be used to disrupt elections. This is possible because AI can be used to create fake news articles and social media posts. These fake articles and posts can then be spread by bots, which are automated software programs that control online accounts.

Bots can be used to automatically like, share, and comment on content. They can also be used to message people en masse. This means that they can easily influence what people see on social media and other online platforms.

If you’re like most people, you probably think that the best way to get better at paraphrasing is to practice on your own. However, this isn’t always the case. While it’s true that practice makes perfect, there are some other things that you can do to help improve your paraphrasing skills. 

In this article, we’ll share with you some of the secrets to becoming a master paraphrase.

The first secret is to understand what you’re reading. This may seem like a no-brainer, but it’s actually very important. When you’re reading something, take the time to think about what it means. If you can’t understand it, chances are you won’t be able to paraphrase it correctly. 

The second secret is to take your time. Don’t try to paraphrase something if you’re in a hurry. If you rush, you’re likely to make mistakes. Instead, take your time and focus on getting it right. 

The third secret is to practice, practice, and practice. The more you practice, the better you’ll become at paraphrasing. To find a text that you can use for practice and start working on it. 

Conclusion:

By following these secrets, you’ll be well on your way to becoming a master paraphrase. So get out there and start practicing!

If you want to improve your paraphrasing skills, there are a few things you can do. One is to practice on your own, and another is to understand what you’re reading. You should also take your time when paraphrasing, and focus on getting it right. And finally, keep practicing!

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