Dick surj on a dang boat.
Picture: Tina Thorpe/Disney
Have you ever climbed aboard? Have you ever hoisted the sail? Have you ever checked into your stateroom? Have you ever, like the best television-viewing minds in America, watched the present that’s maybe single-handedly holding community tv very important in 2024: Physician Odyssey? Skilled madman Ryan Murphy’s newest joint premiered on September 26 and combines the blue-sky good vibes of an aughties USA procedural with the batshit weekly emergencies of his 9-1-1 collection. Murphy’s current reveals at his legacy house base, FX, have been muddled and baroque, however on ABC, he’s obtained the products, as evidenced by the premiere episode of his new present set on a luxurious cruise ship. It stars Joshua Jackson as a health care provider (Dr. Max, however folks actually name him “Physician Odyssey”) with a less-than-mysterious backstory (he obtained COVID and determined to dedicate his life to having enjoyable at sea) and Don Johnson giving off radiant Love Boat vibes because the captain.
This present is immensely foolish, sunny enjoyable, and the entire thing is refreshingly low stress, even when this one cruise ship is the location of greater than sufficient emergencies to carry its personal in ABC’s Thursday-night block, sandwiched between 9-1-1 and Gray’s Anatomy. It might actually be a floating dying entice if Doc Odyssey weren’t so gosh-darn good at doing elaborate medical procedures at sea. As every episode brings aboard a brand new solid of friends with their very own slate of issues, we’ll hold monitor of each catastrophe that goes down on deck (and over the sting) all season lengthy.
Too A lot Shrimp
Rachel Dratch and her husband, Frasier’s boss on the radio station on the unique Frasier, find yourself within the sick bay after the sailing-away dinner. He’s presenting with an allergic response to antibiotics, solely he isn’t on any. It’s Physician Odyssey’s first night time onboard and he’s stumped. Nurse Practitioner Avery Morgan (Phillipa Soo), nevertheless, has labored aboard the Odyssey for years and sees this on a regular basis: Dratch’s man’s obtained iodine poisoning from consuming an excessive amount of of the limitless shrimp on the seafood buffet. This occurs so usually on the boat they’ve obtained a reputation for it: seal illness. These folks are why Purple Lobster went bankrupt, however then once more, if I had a nickel for each time I ingested a medically problematic quantity of shrimp, ?
Broke Dick
It’s clearly a Murph joint once you’re solely 16 minutes into an episode and a man says he “snapped my pee-pee in half.” The medical workforce is known as right into a stateroom the place a man’s dick has been bent in two whereas he was, effectively, rockin’ the boat. It’s a penile fracture, one thing that usually occurs when the woman’s on high and comes down too laborious; Physician Odyssey is aware of this from firsthand undergraduate expertise. The workforce patches it up and tells the couple they must lie low for 4 to 6 weeks, however Phillipa Soo, NP, tells the couple she is aware of a tantric-sex specialist within the subsequent port who can train them alternative routes to consummate their marriage.
Waterslide Throat Kick
Seemingly instantly after OD-ing on all you-can-eat shrimp, Mr. and Mrs. Dratch discover themselves in one other emergency. The couple went down the waterslide one after one other, and when Rachel slid off she throat-kicked her husband to the purpose that he was knocked out and unable to breathe. Doc Odd does a penknife incision to the person’s neck (hate this) and brings him right down to the sick bay to insert a tracheal tube and bodily wrench his sternoclavicular joint again into place, which the nurses discover very dangerous. Doc Odd goes in opposition to protocol, although, and saves this schmo’s life a second time in a single night time. When the Dratches disembark on the finish of the episode, they are saying that regardless of all of it they nonetheless had the most effective week of their lives.
Man Overboard!
By emergency No. 4, you begin to be taught a bit about how this present’s construction will work going ahead. Medical conditions escalate in severity and develop extra severe in tone over the course of an episode. We’ll see how the conditions happen, both in flashbacks (waterslide, broke dick, shrimp freak) or as they occur within the second, as is the case with the younger man who, after taking molly along with his girlfriend on the on-ship nightclub, sneaks out together with her to the higher deck, the place he stands on the railing, does the “I’m king of the world!” factor, and instantly topples overboard. Cap’n Don Johnson is alerted on the brig (terminology examine?) and orders the ship to drop buoys, informing us that solely 15 p.c of overboard instances survive. The medical workforce peels out in a speedboat to search out him, and Doc Odyssey does what Male Nurse Tristan (Sean Teale) calls an “epic” dive to avoid wasting him from hypothermia. All in a crusing’s work for Physician Odyssey.
Emotional Emergency of the Week
Tristan confides in his new supervisor, with whom he has to work each single day, that he’s had a crush on his co-nurse for years. Dr. Odyssey instantly turns round and makes out together with her. In Tristan’s face! Whereas “Despacito” performs!
Correction: A earlier model of this story misstated Avery Morgan’s title. She is a nurse practitioner.